Brittany and I lived in a town called Rock Springs, Wyoming...which is southwest Wyoming, about 3 hours from Salt lake City. It was kind of dry and desolate and very spread out, about 20,000 people. I had been working in an agency for developmentally disabled adults. I'd been promoted to a "facilitator"...which is, I managed 1 of the 6 group homes. I enjoyed it so much, but it became evident that Brittany's behavior was overshadowing everything in my life. So, I made the decision to step down, after 6 months. I just became a "skills trainer" in one of the other homes. Well, due to some sexual harrassment issues from another manager(another long story!), I was transferred to another department. I now worked in the sheltered workshop where many of the clients worked during the day. This was a day time, 7am-3:30pm Mon-Fri job, which was good for me, and I could be home in the evening with Brittany. One of my coworkers at the workshop told me about her mobile home she was trying to sell, north of town and wanted me to look at it. I was sure I couldn't afford anything, but we went to look at it. I subsequently bought the trailer in August of 2000 and Brittany and I moved out there. I thought it would be good for Brittany to have her own yard and I could better get a handle of things.
Brittany was now 11 and her behaviors were sporadic at best. I warned her that if she slammed her door, the door was coming off....and it did come off for quite some time. The school she now attended was a really good school with wonderful teachers that were patient with Brittany through everything. Brittany had been in special education classes since she began school. When we first moved to Wyoming, Brittany's IQ was tested. It was then 64, which falls into the mild retardation range. Now, I am not neccesarily a believer in IQ tests because people are more than just a number. Here it is now, 3 years later. I went to a meeting with teachers there and I was told she was tested again, now it was only 66. They also stated that she is mentally behind at least 3 years, meaning she was more like an 8 year old. This made sense to me. Brittany still had "accidents" with wetting, mostly. With the behavioral problems since she was young, it was more difficult than usual potty training her. Now when she wet herself, it was behavioral. Her hygiene was horrible and I basically had to take care of her like a baby, with her kicking and screaming all the way. She would sit on my kitchen floor and just pee. I'd ask her why she didn't get up and go to the bathroom and she'd say, "Well, I wasn't going to make it anyway."
I will never forget Thanksgiving of 2000. I had decided to make Brittany and I our own big dinner. When it was time to eat, Brittany wanted to sit in the living room and watch tv while eating. I told her no, we were going to eat at the table and have a nice dinner. She became irate and I did what I usually did, told her to go to her room until she calmed down. She screamed, "Oh yah, well I am NOT eating!" I told her just to go to her room and when she wanted to calm down and come eat with me, she could. She came out almost an hour later. I asked her if she wanted to eat now.
She yelled at me, "Well YOU said I couldn't eat! You don't want me to have anything!"
I had to kind of giggle at this because this was the usual turnaround for Brittany. Well, she did eat but it really showed me alot of things.
I have noticed since she was young, there is a pattern to her behaviors. Somewhere between Thanksgiving until after New Year's, Brittany's behaviors were always at their worst. I believe it is from all the stimulation the holidays bring...just overload. So, I learned not to really care for those holidays...especially Christmas. And the Christmas of 2000 was not any different...only worse for me. I had very little money, just barely scraped up enough to buy Brittany a few little presents. She opened them, telling me, "That's all I get? You NEVER want me to have anything, do you?" Somewhere between anger and hurt, I told her, "Well, you don't have to even have this. I can give them to someone else!" No, of course, she didn't want that.
Just when I didn't think things could get any worse...in comes January of 2001.....
Brittany was now 11 and her behaviors were sporadic at best. I warned her that if she slammed her door, the door was coming off....and it did come off for quite some time. The school she now attended was a really good school with wonderful teachers that were patient with Brittany through everything. Brittany had been in special education classes since she began school. When we first moved to Wyoming, Brittany's IQ was tested. It was then 64, which falls into the mild retardation range. Now, I am not neccesarily a believer in IQ tests because people are more than just a number. Here it is now, 3 years later. I went to a meeting with teachers there and I was told she was tested again, now it was only 66. They also stated that she is mentally behind at least 3 years, meaning she was more like an 8 year old. This made sense to me. Brittany still had "accidents" with wetting, mostly. With the behavioral problems since she was young, it was more difficult than usual potty training her. Now when she wet herself, it was behavioral. Her hygiene was horrible and I basically had to take care of her like a baby, with her kicking and screaming all the way. She would sit on my kitchen floor and just pee. I'd ask her why she didn't get up and go to the bathroom and she'd say, "Well, I wasn't going to make it anyway."
I will never forget Thanksgiving of 2000. I had decided to make Brittany and I our own big dinner. When it was time to eat, Brittany wanted to sit in the living room and watch tv while eating. I told her no, we were going to eat at the table and have a nice dinner. She became irate and I did what I usually did, told her to go to her room until she calmed down. She screamed, "Oh yah, well I am NOT eating!" I told her just to go to her room and when she wanted to calm down and come eat with me, she could. She came out almost an hour later. I asked her if she wanted to eat now.
She yelled at me, "Well YOU said I couldn't eat! You don't want me to have anything!"
I had to kind of giggle at this because this was the usual turnaround for Brittany. Well, she did eat but it really showed me alot of things.
I have noticed since she was young, there is a pattern to her behaviors. Somewhere between Thanksgiving until after New Year's, Brittany's behaviors were always at their worst. I believe it is from all the stimulation the holidays bring...just overload. So, I learned not to really care for those holidays...especially Christmas. And the Christmas of 2000 was not any different...only worse for me. I had very little money, just barely scraped up enough to buy Brittany a few little presents. She opened them, telling me, "That's all I get? You NEVER want me to have anything, do you?" Somewhere between anger and hurt, I told her, "Well, you don't have to even have this. I can give them to someone else!" No, of course, she didn't want that.
Just when I didn't think things could get any worse...in comes January of 2001.....
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